Archive for May, 2002

Enough of the morose mourning over my beloved forests. There’s not a dang thing I can do about it.

So, I’ll move on to an issue that may allow me the luxury of kicking some butt. Heh. Then again, maybe not.

forklift has what he calls the Man School. It’s fully of hilarity, humor, and irony. I loved the installation I read. He cracked me up.

The sad thing, though, is that there are lot’s and lot’s of men out there who think that a woman who has strength, intellect, or a “kick-butt” attitude should be locked away.

Pat Robertson, the esteemed man that he is (*snort*) said, “Feminism encourages women to leave their husbands, kill their children, practice witchcraft, destroy capitalism and become lesbians.” My god, if every feminist left her husband, killed her children, practiced witchcraft, destroyed capitalism, and became lesbians we (the U.S.) wouldn’t have 1) many men left, 2) many children left, 3) lot’s and lot’s of witches, 4) no U.S. market, and 5) lot’s of lesbian couples AND same sex marriages and laws that supported same sex relationships.

I was at RiottGyrrrl’s site yesterday and she is trying to get a membership in Heartless Bitch International.

I’m thinking to myself…”Self…why would anyone want to be labeled a heartless bitch?” So, I decided to go to the site and read what they had to say. Heck, I’m sure I’ve been labeled that at least once in my lifetime….might as well see if I’d qualify or if I am really a “nice girl.” Oh, yeah…

They have a manifesto that includes such things as “Are you sick of lazy women who use emotional and sexual manipulation to get what they want instead of using their own brains and muscles?” and “Are you fed up with women who feel they HAVE to be in a “Relationship” in order to be whole, and will sacrifice their self-esteem and personal growth in order to avoid being on their own?”.

I’m going through this list and thinking (again) to myself, “Self, are you truly a “heartless bitch” just because you agree with many of these things? Or are you a woman who believes in being strong, self-sufficient, and intelligent and dealing with situations as such?”

Ok…I never lie to myself so, of course, I said I’m a strong, intelligent woman. ;-)

At the end of the Heartless Bitch International page is a notice…and it reads ” Has HBI got you all hot under the collar? Before you run off in a snit, ready to send email detailing the extent of your ire, look up the words “irony”, “satire” and “caricature” in the dictionary….”.

Kind of like the Man School. It made me laugh…

and laugh…

and laugh… :-P

I was just having a conversation with a friend about writing and responses. She and I have belonged to an online community for over 5 years and we’ve watched the ebb & flow of the ways people respond to different kinds of posts.

I write because I love to write. I share things about me because that’s what I’m an expert in and because I think some of it is interesting to others. I also write because I want to hear back from others, know their experiences, hear their opinions. I don’t write to hear my own voice. I can talk to myself if I want that. Heh.

I wonder, though, how one garners responses. Not only here…but everywhere. Maybe I don’t write posts that are remotely interesting to others. Maybe I haven’t figured out the types of writing that will appeal to others.

Maybe it shouldn’t matter.

But it does.

Nearly three years ago, I did something that would impact my life and change it in ways that I never thought would happen.  I shaved my head.  Now, most people would say “so what?”  The thing is, I shaved it for a good reason.

A friend of mine, a co-worker, the woman who got me into the computer business years before, found out she had breast cancer.  She decided to shave her head before the chemo took it all.  It was fairly reasonable.  She knew she’d lose it anyway because of the way her hair reacted to everything.  A few of us, 2 women and 3 men, decided that we would show support and shave our heads, too.

It was the end of June and hot and it was something we could do to show someone that we cared about her a lot.

The newspaper showed up.  So did the local tv station.  That’s not why my life changed, though.

I kept it shaved for 6 months as she went in and out of the hospital.  I was stopped often by people in town saying they had read about us or saw us on tv and that they appreciated what we were doing.  I heard their stories about cancer and how it had affected their lives.  They told me of loved ones beating it and others who didn’t but whose lives lived on in their memories.

Six months down the road, it was winter.  I was cold from the heat loss through my head.  I was wearing doo-rags to bed to keep my head warm.  My friend was in the hospital again.

The chemo wasn’t working.  The cancer was now little lumps that had spread throughout her body and had become invasive.  It had spread to her brain.  She had six months to live.  She told me it was time to quit shaving our heads and just work on the future.

That was 2 1/2 years ago.  My friend is still alive but is saying her last goodbyes.  Nothing is helping anymore and she knows that she isn’t long for this world.

I bring this up because I found out last night that a high school teacher of mine was diagnosed with bone marrow cancer earlier this week and it is terminal.  She has gone through cancer before and has refused chemo that would have helped her because she was afraid of losing her hair.  She wouldn’t be going through this now, the doctors say, if she had taken care of it earlier.

She’s a beautiful woman.  She would be beautiful without hair.  It wouldn’t matter.

We become vain sometimes, though, in our quest to live in this world.  So much of the world is about looks and how young we appear.  It isn’t always about what is in our hearts or minds but how our skin has retained its youthful appearance and how long and wavy our hair still is.

I think both of these women are amazing and wonderful.  I am sad that this world will no longer have either of them in it.  I am sadder still because one of these women did not need to be in this place.

I wanted to link to sites where you could help out if you’re interested. 

I donated my hair to Locks of Love (http://www.locksoflove.com).  It goes to kids who are diagnosed with alopecia.

Children with Cancer Assistance Fund (http://www.childrenscancerresearch.org/) is ongoing funding for research and programs that help treat children with cancer.

Cancer Care (http://www.cancercare.org/) gives assistance (counseling, education, referral, etc.) to those with cancer.

Patient Centers (http://www.patientcenters.com/breastcancer/) specifically helps those with advanced metastatic breast cancer.

Alternative Cancer Therapy (http://www.cancure.org/financial_assistance.htm) is to give different types of help in alternative therapies.

When 9/11 occurred, I was like most Americans. I was shocked, hurt, upset, and angry. This all left me relatively quickly, though, I must admit. I live 3000 miles away and it was very distant from where I was while it was occurring.

My way to deal with issues is to analyze them, figure them out, ask questions. I began, nearly instantaneously, to dissect the issue at hand and to try to hear what was *not* being said.

I was flummoxed when we were told over and over that this was a surprise attack, that the government did not know it was going to happen and that they could not have prevented it. I questioned that. We have some of the most advanced tracking equipment in the world and we have some of the most protected airspace in the world. But we didn’t know that an attack was going to happen and had no way of stopping it?

I feel somewhat justified in my questioning of the “facts” now that I hear that we *did*, in fact, know that Osama bin Laden was planning on hijacking planes and was planning on some sort of attack. I feel justified because I was called anti-American, a terrorist, a loser, and all sorts of other things…because I questioned my government!

I don’t think the whole story is out yet. I doubt it will be while this President is in office. He’s secretive about nearly everything and if he made a mistake on a grand scale, I doubt we’d hear it while he’s in office.

Suffice it to say that now we’re hearing of FBI agents who did tell their superiors about large numbers of foreign students taking flight lessons but were ignored. We now know that the White House knew of a threat.

Skeletons don’t stay in closets too long.

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I exercise my right to question as an American. I believe I live in a great nation that welcomes diverse and sometimes unconventional thinking. This kind of thought has gotten us to great heights. It can also be our downfall. However that may be, I enjoy my right to partake in it. I do not take a stance that my country is not without its share of evil or malicous intents. We’re just as bad as the next guy. We’re also just as good.

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Wacky Links

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What is your Road Rage Quotient?

I ranked 7-20 points = You have your good and bad days on the road. Overall you only suffer from mild road rage.

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Crankbunny will not be for everyone. But if you think outside the box and like something a bit different, you may enjoy this site. There is some illustrated nudity so if you’re offended by that type of thing it’s probably not for you.

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Have you ever wanted to come up with the wackiest name on the ‘net? NameMage is for you. It’s really meant to design names for Dungeons and Dragons but you could find a name for your next child here. Heh…

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Fires are burning here in Arizona. So far, 6 lovely, large, dream homes have been destroyed about 90 miles from where I live in the Prescott National Forest. I only fear this is the beginning of a tragic summer.

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Until next time…be kind to one another.

Peace.