Thursday March 7, 2002

Sharing the Road

I drive a lot. I love to drive. Anyone who has read my posts on the cork, has had the occasion to read some of my roadtrip or travel stories.

I have made 6 CDs to travel by. They include every type of song imaginable. But, by far, there is one that always gets me singing and wanting to dance.

That old dog has chained you up alright
Give you everything you need
To live inside a twisted cage
Sleep beside and empty rage
I had a dream I was your hero

I went to a munch last weekend. I met Mistress Sahara and subdude there. We got on the subject of roads. I told them that I can discern between the different substances used for making the roads, whether it’s concrete, blacktop, asphalt (which does feel different that blacktop), the corrugated concrete, dirt roads (of course), and various others. They feel different under the tires. I have gotten used to the differences.

Damn I wish I was your lover
I’ll rock you till the daylight comes
Make sure you are smiling and warm
I am everything
Tonight I’ll be your mother I will
Do such things to ease your pain
Free your mind and you won’t feel ashamed

This took us down a different route. I told them that I have this thing about the road, about driving. It’s highly erotic to me. I love the feel of the earth beneath my tires, the way the road feels. I become very sexual and sensual while driving.

This monkey can’t stand to see you black and blue
Give you something sweet each time you
Come inside my jungle book
What is it just too good
Don’t say you’ll stay
‘Cause then you go away

This isn’t something I share with just anyone. I thought I was in a safe enough place. You know…some of those people had kinks that weren’t my thing but unless it was incredibly illegal (children, etc.), I wouldn’t have said a word. It’s just not my thing.

Damn I wish I was your lover
I’ll rock you till the daylight comes
Make sure you are smiling and warm
I am everything
Tonight I’ll be your mother I will
Do such things to ease your pain
Free your mind and you won’t feel ashamed

Those of you who know me, know that I don’t talk a lot in large crowds. I get overwhelmed. I’m incredibly shy. I’m afraid I’ll say something that will bring on ridicule or anger. I spoke, I shared, and I got ridicule. The submissive across the table looked at me, shook her head, and said, in a tone that to me sounded like disdain, “That’s a new one. I’ve never heard of that.”

Shucks for me there is no other
You’re the only shoe that fits
I can’t imagine I’ll grow out of it
Damn I wish I was your lover

I felt so humiliated. I did. Perhaps I shouldn’t have but I shared something very intimate about myself. I was sharing it with two friends and she just happened to be there. It still bothered me, though. I shouldn’t have cared what she thought and what I said was pretty benign to some things I’ve seen or heard.

If I was your girl believe me
I’d turn on the Rolling Stones
We could groove along and feel much better
I could do it forever and ever
Give me an hour to kiss you
Walk through heaven’s door I’m sure
We don’t need no doctor to feel much better
Let me in
Forever and ever and ever and ever

Rude drivers piss me off. When you’re on an interstate and others are driving faster, why is there always someone who stays in the fast lane even though they are driving slower than anyone else? And why is it, at night, that a car will come up on you really fast, then sit in the other lane where their lights shine right in your mirrors? And then, all of a sudden, 5 minutes later, go speeding by?

I sat on the mountainside with peace of mind
I lay by the ocean making love to her with visions clear
Walked for days with no one near
And I return as chained and bound to you

I got to spend the day with family. It was a joy. It was bliss. I got to kiss the little redheaded pumpkin girl and love her…and hear her call my name. And I got to hear my mom say “I love you.” And that was a gift.

Damn I wish I was your lover
I’ll rock you till the daylight comes
Make sure you are smiling and warm
I am everything
Tonight I’ll be your mother I will
Do such things to ease your pain
Free your mind and you won’t feel ashamed