focus

Focus. I need to learn to focus more. I’ve never been able to allow my mind to sit still long enough to focus on one thing for too long. Even when I’m doing extremely detailed work like quilting or needlepoint, my mind is racing ahead to what I will be doing in an hour or later that day.

This becomes extremely important when I’m being given instruction or being asked to listen to understand what is being asked of me.

I hear the words. I file them away. Then I move on. I just pass over them and move on to the next thought.

This is not only disrespectful to the person giving me instruction but it can lead to disastrous results. I may miss out on something important. I may actually fail at an assignment because I filed it away quickly without actually paying attention.

Most people who know me would not say I’m a flighty person. I appear stable. I appear well-grounded. In fact, that’s one of the things that is said about me most often.

However, try to pin me down. Try to actually get me to focus on something and there are problems.

My devotional is giving me focus. There are people in my life who are helping me focus.

Last night I had a moment when I felt myself start to cross a boundary that shouldn’t be crossed because of my lack of focus. I was whining and being silly because I was trying to do too many things at once (there was a playoff baseball game on, for goodness sake!!!). I was joking and teasing and playing…and in one moment, I realized that I was about to do something that would be disrespectful.

A few days ago, I may not have realized it. Even now, thinking back, I may have slipped over the line. What is important, though, is that I’m seeing it more clearly. I’m focusing more on what is important even if it is in baby steps.

I always say, I’m a work in progress. Sometimes the work is arduous. Sometimes it is laborious.

It is always worth it.