photo by me

“And now here is my secret, a very simple secret; it is only with the heart that one can see rightly, what is essential is invisible to the eye.”
~ Antoine de Saint-Exupery ~

I’m using an older image this week for my self-portrait check in but the words are all new.

I stumbled upon a blog this morning that hit me in the stomach like a ton of bricks (oh, don’t you love similes?). Losing Lucy is about one woman’s weight loss journey.

I know. You’re saying that there are a million of these out there and why is this one so different? It’s probably not that different but it is new and she is refreshingly honest. She tells us how much she weighs and what her struggles have been.

I’ve never been that honest on here. I’m embarrassed about how much I weigh. I shouldn’t weigh this much and I wonder how I ever got here.

I was that skinny girl. For most of my life, I was that girl. I’m 5’10″ and weighed 110 pounds. I was skinny. Dangerously so, I’m guessing.

So, I’m changing my lifestyle. I eat around 1500 calories per day. I eat anything I want (and I typically eat pretty healthy – lots of fruits and veggies) but I eat around that many calories. I’m exercising between 30 and 40 minutes a day. I am losing weight.

It’s slow because my body is rebelling against me. It thinks we should be eating more and I’m trying to retrain it into knowing that we don’t actually need that much food and I had been abusing it with all of the food I was putting into it. We struggle against one another but I know I will win out.

I’m stubborn that way.

It’s paying off. I got several comments this week from co-workers who asked if I’m losing weight. That was nice. People are actually noticing.

I just nod and blush. I don’t want to jinx it. I just want to do it. I want to make this happen.

And I will.