photo by me

That’s the sound of my head hitting my desk over and over and over.

*thud*

*thud*

*thud*

Sometimes I just say stupid things. I get nervous. I talk too much when I’m nervous. I say stupid things.

Firefighter guy called on Saturday morning to explain that he couldn’t come because of his back. A conversation ensued. We started talking about some of the things we’ve done in the past and some things that we like to do. He talked about how he used to be a tandem parachute guide (the guy who flies with you when you jump from an airplane). He told me a bit about his brothers (one lives in Britain).

In his profile, he has an image of him poised on red rocks – the Toroweap lookout at the Grand Canyon. And so we started talking about the Canyon and about river trips. I’m pretty familiar with the whole river trip issue. Most of the trips originate from here (most of the big rafting companies are located here) and a lot of Canyon/Colorado River research trips are led by professors from my university.

Then he asks me if I’ve ever rafted or if I’ve ever wanted to raft.

“Oh!” I exclaim. “I’ve always thought that a full river trip would be a great honeymoon!”

Ahem.

So, one of the things that I do realize is that you don’t talk about marriage in your first phone conversation. And yet, what does Dawn do? Oh, yes. And it’s not even like marriage is on my mind. Oh, no. It’s not.

I’ve just always thought that would be a cool honeymoon. But it’s probably not the wisest thing to talk about during that first phone call.

And I have a feeling that I may have said the wrong thing. He said he’d call again yesterday but didn’t. This is the second time he said he’d call and didn’t. Apparently, I open my mouth and say stupid things and people are repelled by that.

And yes, yes…I know that I may be jumping to conclusions. But I also know that he was online since we last talked so it’s not like he’s dead or anything. He just didn’t call (again) when he said he would. And that irritates me.

Oy.