book review

In her introduction to this book, Audacia Ray writes, “I was seduced by the ability to be myself — the person I am in my brain, not in my awkward social moments.” With this statement, Ray expresses the fundamental appeal of meeting, hooking up, and creating relationships via the Internet.

While she discusses the difficulties of being female online, the sexual innuendos, the disregard for women’s perspectives, and the vicious attacks on physical attributes (simply because one is a woman), she notes that women also feel a freedom by being online. They are, if somewhat disembodied (as if you’re not disembodied in online communities), treated as “one of the guys” until their gender is revealed (ala the current hoopla over Digby, the political wonk).

Ray interviews women, asking them their opinions on the usefulness of the Internet as a tool to make connections to others. She writes, “the Internet allows women to be picky in ways that are largely structured around personal deal breakers.”

Ray’s book runs the gamut from innocuous discussions / conversational exchanges online to porn to creating relationships (one-night-stands or long-term) offline. It is an interesting look into a woman’s perspective on relationships, sex, and love on the Internet.