dating

photo by me

I realize that some of the recent entries are not typical of what I’ve written in the past. However, I’m trying to understand what is going on in the world today, why dating is so difficult, and share what kinds of difficulties and/or barriers that single woman are facing today.

It seems, however, that these posts make my regular commentors a bit shy. I understand not wanting to say too much. Some of this is inflammatory. Some of it is hard to deal with. But a lot of this is my reality and I want to share that.

With that being said, it seems that Forbes pulled the article from yesterday. According to Gawker, the article couldn’t be found anywhere (although this is said in much more vivid terms on that site).

The Hipster Pit decided to retaliate and write Nine Reasons You Should Marry a Career Bitch:

Disappointed in myself for taking the recent misogynist pap published in Forbes so seriously, I have decided, upon some thought, to publish my own photo essay: Nine Reasons You Should Marry a Career Bitch. Enjoy:

1. She won’t be so clingy if she got something to do. I think this is pretty self-explanatory – send her to the office all day, let her feel important, and she won’t be interrupting you every five minutes with needy whining because she’s bored at home. “Wah, I need to talk to an adult, Wah, I need a raise in my allowance to buy shoes, wahhhhh, pick up the drycleaning on the way home.” Useless.

2. She’ll end up with a major guilt complex. Lisen. Even if she is making more than you, no one has to know it. You can take those checks, buy yourself some golf clubs, and exploit her sense of guilt about not being around for her kids to ensure that she’ll spend the whole weekend with them, cleaning the house, and crying on the phone to her mom instead of nagging you to clean out the garage. The result? Tee time, baby.

3. She’s more likely to order pizza. And let’s face it. You married her for her ass, not her cooking skills. Bring on the pepperoni, baby.

4. She’s less likely to turn your son into a sissy mama’s boy. And that kid is never going to be on the varsity team if he’s still on your stay-at-home wife’s apron strings. Sticking him in daycare gives him a chance to get some guts, so what if the other kids are beating him up, gives him goddamn character. You know what happens to sissy boys. They take theater class in high school and they end up light in their loafers.

5. She’s less likely to make your baby girl into a tragic mess. Women who work have way fewer hours to enter their children in little girl beauty pageants, harping in their weight and various imagined shortcomings, and ultimately turning her into a possible sociopath who is going to end up being one of “those girls” in high school, possibly marring your reputation in the community, or, even worse, banging one of your buddies.

6. She will be more likely to wear high heels. Women who stay at home let themselves go. No sooner are you married than your woman is lying around the house all day in sweatpants and dirty socks. Want a woman to keep wearing those hot black hose and stilettos – send her to the office.

7. She’s less likely to question your “business trips,” if you know what I mean. All you have to do is say, “Baby, you’re a career woman, you know what this is all about.”

8. You might be the one to get something out of the divorce. Hey, if she’s making more than you, YOU could be the guy living on alimony. Sweet.

9. She won’t notice you’re a douchebag. She will be too tired from trying to do everything, and deal with you, that she won’t have any time left to notice that she’s married an asshole.

The simple fact about all of this is that when people write stupid things, it does get people riled up and they are going to comment. There is a lot going on out there that makes women of a certain age or economic standing or educational standing appear as less desireable simply because they chose to go a non-traditional route. Think about this. Think about the challenges that we face.

I’ve never chosen the easy route but we are constantly bombarded with the likes of Forbes or other mysoginistic articles that abound. It’s like trying to stand upright in 100 mph winds.

Just punch me again.

And then I find a post by Suzanne. I’m not sure what to think about her take on this topic. However, the article that she quotes is interesting: Big-Earning Wives and the Men Who Love Them. Redbook is such a trendy magazine. *snort*

You see? It’s on all sides. It’s insidious.

Yeah, sometimes these topics are uncomfortable but this is my reality and what I face every single day.

photo by me

Earlier this week I commented on Jonathan’s response about his preferences to date younger woman.

Today I open up my blog and I find a comment from Rick Fisk:

It’s not bullshit. For whatever reason, our society has encouraged women to start their families after they have reached the age where they should be having grandkids. This makes no sense. You didn’t chose that life when you were younger. Why place responsibility on your date for the choices you made?

I have only a few things to say about this.

1. The double standards are rolling in. It’s apparently NOT okay for a woman to bear children at an older age but it IS okay for a man to want to date a younger woman in order to father a child at an older age.
2. Women are being defined by their child-bearing status. We are not allowed latitude by those men who have placed us in specific categories.
3. The age of 39 is apparently “grandma” age and I should just give it all up because I wasted my grand old youth in NOT having a child in an abusive relationship because I had the forethought to at least think about that.

Do you guys actually THINK before writing?

Hypocrisy at its best.